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When Nothing's Wrong

What about when nothing's wrong, but you're miserable? Is that a thing other people experience? That was me today.


It's gorgeous out today, 27 degrees celcius, and I've spent most of the day out in our yard - either on the patio or in our little kiddie-pool, enjoying the weather and the freedom to just be outside. I had five whole hours to just exist with Frisky (my cat) and slowly putter away at a few admin tasks and play Pixel Cat's End while I sat. I didn't realise I was grumpy until Hubby was up and about; at that point I became almost desperate to protect my isolated time outside and was unintentionally quite rude to my husband.


So what am I doing about this weird misery?


- I took a nap.

- I ate food, and made sure to take my supplements.

- I'm allowing myself a diet Coca-Cola, which is a comfort food.

- I chose not to take my dopamine blocker today. It's a digestive aide, but I'm wondering if it's affecting my mood and I'll be chatting with my doctor about that on Monday.

- I looked at my calendar to see if there might be an anniversary reaction or maybe my monthly cycle contributing to my experience.

- I gave Hubby a status report because expressing where I'm at and putting things into words is an effective regulating activity for me.

- I'm writing in my blog, also for the above reason.


There's something about putting words to what I'm feeling that somehow makes the feeling less scary, less monstrous. It doesn't decrease the feeling, but it makes it more bearable because now I can accurately identify all of its pieces.




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